14th February 2006 - Day 120

An impending sense of doom has striked.

Panic. Panic. Panic.

I think I still don't know a thing about the exams tomorrow. I don't seem to recall anything at all. I take back my words. It is difficult to read stuffs in another language, especially when there's not much time left.

Some of the topics sinks in, but to phrase them in my own words, it's not really possible. Sure I can read them, but that doesn't mean I can use them effectively in my speech. Definition of a certain term? I probably could only give a word or two about it. That is, if I can remember them.

Commiting them to memory is a costly option now with the amount of stuffs I have. Not that I didn't try to do it earlier. The Verweilzeit in my head is relatively short. And it doesn't make sense to memorise things which I cannot even understand.

My brain refuses to recognise any words I read. The system just completely shut down. I can't even form a proper sentence. This must be the only exam period which I spent so much time on and understood only so little.

Among all the chaos and uncertainty, a voice tells me this.

"No worries! You will definitely make it!"

"Why?"

"Because you're an exchange student! Not some full time student here. Surely you aren't that outstanding that they want to keep you here for another semester. And there's the language as a mitigating factor. Everyone else says you'll definitely pass, it's just a matter of how well you do."

I choose to believe what the voice said. After all, I did what I could during my revisions. If things do go wrong, we'll discuss that when it really happens.

So, I'm going to sleep early tonight.